For those anyone that was waiting for the findings from that $115 Brooklyn ticket- see the below measurements.  A reminder: $115 fine for parking within 4 feet of a fire hydrant.

For those that are scared by modern magic like “math”- and 

confused by complicated jargon like “numbers”, each white strip is 14″ (as measured by the distance from one point in the wheel to the opposing (see inset).  Still with me?  Good.  Even over assuming distance and perspective on the sidewalk rather than the tail of the car (which is further)- there are 5 of these units between my car, and the furthest point of the hydrant.  For those keeping score- that is 70″, or 5.83 feet.  

Fuck yeah, America.  So I go online to contest this farcical abuse of my tax dollars, which I find is not yet loaded into their systems.  

Must be the government shutdown.  

I go on to read; one must enter any disputes within 30 days (not working days.. 30 days) of receiving a ticket.  BUT the ticket won’t load into the system until 7-10 business days (which is potentially 16 earth days, 17 since tomorrow is MLK day).  That’s fair.  

Well- if I wanted to make a difference, I’d have voted, right?  (I don’t live there, btw- my vote doesn’t matter; also, i’m not a corrupt politician, teamster or otherwise crooked Union member, so my vote in New York politics wouldn’t have mattered either.)